You win some...you lose some

Sometimes no matter how you try it just won't work. Even if you have given your all...it's never enough. Patience ran out and the only thing left to do is just give up and let go. Simple courtesy and consideration now become difficult. What went wrong? I don't know. I value my friends and love ones a lot. But in times where you know you are not given the same...maybe there are things that are not meant to stay. It was good until it lasted.

H I A TU S

My mind is off work today currently listening to Secrets by One Republic. This song putting me in a trance...maybe this is what I need right now. Just to free my mind for a while.

I have been staring at this blank document in front of me for hours and I just can’t seem to stir up my brain to start doing some work. Thinking of going on a hiatus, just need to finish some commitments but eventually go away for a while. Haven’t been myself lately…must be PMSing but I am not sure. There are moments in your life that you are floating and not sure where you are standing.

Secrets – One Republic

I need another story

Something to get off my chest

My life gets kinda boring

Need something that i can confess

Till all my sleeves are stained red
From all the truth that I've said
Come by it honestly I swear
Thought you saw me wink, no, I've been on the brink, so
[CHORUS]
Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
I'm sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time
Don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm Gonna give all my secrets away
My God, amazing how we got this far
It's like were chasing all those stars
Who's driving shiny big black cars
And everyday I see the news
All the problems that we could solve
And when a situation rises
Just write it into an album
Singing straight to cold
I don't really like my flow, no, so
[CHORUS]
Got no reason
Got no shame
Got no family
I can blame
Just don't let me disappear
I'ma tell you everything
[CHORUS x2]
All my secrets away (x2)

Brush it off

Often times we are faced with either difficult situation, difficult people and if you are lucky…both. How do you deal with these things? As we get older we are expected to be wiser. I have been through hell and back with my life. Life is short and every moment should be something that you would like to remember as memorable. Good or bad? As long as it contributed to your well being and will make you a better person. Each moment spent should be a story to tell or remember. When faced with these circumstances I just choose to either:

• See things in a positive perspective
• Put myself in someone else’s shoes
• Pray harder that I have the patience and courage to deal with it
• Shake it off and move on
• Let it slide and totally forget about it
• Give more importance to people and relationship
• Be thankful of the other blessings that I have

If you let yourself be affected by this negativity then no one wins. Everyone is on a losing end. Life and situations are hard…no one said it is easy. You have the choice…don’t move and complain when stuck in a rain or learn to enjoy and experience it. Life is beautiful!

To dream anything that you want to dream. Thats the beauty of the human mind. To do anything you want to do, that is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limits, that is the courage to succeed. -Bernard Admonds

P A T I E N C E

Sometimes your friendship will be tested. When someone ditched you because something big is happening in her life you just let it be. You may be pissed off for a while but you try to understand to the best that you can. You don’t give in to anger and think of why you value your friendship. Flaking on someone is NEVER okay. When I say you understand then that friend of yours better have a very good reason for doing so. Most often my patience is tested when faced with these kinds of situations. I give high regards to my friends and I hope that they too. So I just let this one slide and be a good friend she needs in times like this. Definitely meditating and praying for PATIENCE today.

Entry 11: 2 more lbs

So I ended and started my year right with workout. Though did a bit of binging and drinking during the holidays but it didn’t stop me from losing weight. I figured I can eat a bit so as not to spoil the holiday spirit but definitely did some extra run and doubled my efforts just to stay fit. I went to gym and basketball 4 x a week before the festivities. Hard core physical activities…yeah…yeah…blame it on CTA who is a gym and basketball rat who pushes me and keeps me up on my toes in losing more. Man!crunches, weights and repetitions are painful…in a good way.

So I weighted myself again yesterday after weeks of not checking…tandadanan…I lost 2 lbs. I tried an old short skirt that didn’t fit me before and the last time I wore it was 3 years ago. It fit just right. Seeing results and feeling good about myself makes me motivated to work out more and loose more. Another 10-15 lbs for this month...let's go!

Stereo Hearts

Just lovin this song...make my heart sing.

Life is just better

If you read my previous blogs (some are still here and some I had to take out) you would know my real story. Maybe I said too much that is why I never really felt disclosing my identity here so that I can be more open and vocal about my thoughts. I made life changing decisions for 2011. Definitely things that will be for the books.

Is life better? Yes it is. I feel so blessed with many good things that was given to me for the past months. For the days I go to church and pray...God gave me what I have always been requesting. Healing from pain. I was free from it. It's been months now that I can say I am okay. Was comfortable being alone just loving the sanctuary of my home and my own solitude. I plan for myself and do things for myself and my love ones.

Though having someone would be nice.  Of course I do miss the feeling of being in love. I miss giving out surprises and taking care of someone.The times you call or text someone just to remind them of how special they are. That someone who is your driving force and support group of 1. If God grants it then I just consider it as a bonus.

Happiness is a perspective and I changed it. I try to see the good things in every bad situation. Appreciate everything that surrounds me. Made more friends and been traveling. Take care of myself more and eat healthier. I just prayed harder and been nicer.  Life has been good to me and I'm just happier. I can't complain. =)

Journey Continuous: Tagaytay

Another restless weekend...my feet itching to travel. Where to go? A hint of cool air in a tropical country is like rain in a desert. Weekend galavanting with CTA. Thought of a place that is close to Manila…a destination I can drive…we ended up in Tagaytay. So our morning started with breakfast before we left then off we go at 11am. From EDSA take SLEX go straight and exit at Sta Rosa then go straight all the way to Tagaytay City.

 • First Stop: Cliff House for lunchie. There are several selections in the area but you have to wait to be seated since there are many people who usually goes here to eat especially over the weekend. You get the feel of California dining. The view and the cool wind was a conducive to relaxing and you won’t even notice the time pass by. They serve good Italian food and price is reasonable. Definitely never miss this on your next trip. Price: P150-400 each dish. Definitely a must try are their pasta, risotto and smoothies.

• Next Stop: People’s Park in The Sky. Just to get a view of Tagaytay. They say this is the highest peak in the area and you get a good view of everything. It was breath taking since it’s past 4PM. We stayed there until it’s almost sunset. My favorite time of the day. There are several souvenir shops there that sell t-shirts (cost around P140-150) and crafts. Best time to visit is during the weekdays and during late afternoon. Make sure to go back in downtown before the sunset since the zigzag roads don’t have street lights and place gets foggy at night.

• Last Stop: Bag of Beans. It is almost dark and we had to do another stop. I have been meaning to eat at this restaurant to try their Shepherd’s Pie. We weren’t hungry but we just can’t resist trying. So we ordered tea and pie for a light meal before heading back to Manila. It was just okay. The mashed potato was kinda dry and I expected more from them. The place is cozy and you get the feeling of countryside.

A good weekend place to explore...good food, nice scenery and cold weather. If you just want to get away from the stress of the city this is the place to go..and you can almost touch the sky. Good trip!